it's been a minute 

since i've sat beneath this tree 

i'm sorry 

i've been between the pages 

counting the minutes  

picking my nails 

pacing and laughing 

just pretending 

-- to have a beating heart 

watching and waiting 

for you to walk towards me 

you scratch and you bite  

just to see me bleed 

you ruffle 

just to see me buckle 

when you know 

i've pined 

only in my mind 

you're not ever going to stick your neck out 

for me 

are you 

you aren't ever going to give  

what i don't ask 

an unsolicitied visit 

some food to let me know you want me alive 

you don't listen 

enough 

to pick up 

my hints 

i don't want to want to take that