i guess i was always right 

yanno 

about not being wanted 

a 14 yo SATC watching Sarah  

watching me 

turn 28 

and still not spend a night

next to a someone 

who would watch me 

and want 

now he's gone 

a whisper to the wind

just like a girl

it's not like i wanted 

him 

just on my couch 

a body to perch next to 

i just wonder what 

i said 

that got him 

to do it 

was it my question asking 

my mouth 

the way i said

"you'll find someone" 

was it my belly 

or my burden  

or maybe making

him buy my drink 

confidently 

an act i didn't have down

i'm starting to think 

it was all of it 

wasn't it? 

not just the parts 

my indecisiveness 

my talking off the cuff 

my oh my oh my 

the things 

and the betweens

the middle

and the ends 

it was all there 

but i still picture 

you in my apt 

even now

that we don't talk 

it's only been 4 days 

but it might as well be 4 years 

i know it 

yanno 

that's the thing 

i know it